Sunday, August 31, 2008

I should've seen this one coming



Even though I'm a rabid sufferer of Clinton Derangement Syndrome, I've recently unearthed my bepenised feminist sympathy pills. And for Sen. Clinton, Sarah Palin's nomination is like a Christmas Day turd. Yes, Sen. Clinton is still a race-baiting corpo-fascist, but I know a Christmas Day turd when I see it.

This one stinks to hog heaven.

I thought Republicans were afraid of The Vagina. They spend so much of their time cowering in fear, trying to own it or get back inside it. But White Male Penis Power™ generally dictates that imperialism and the clutches of victory outweigh the inevitable counter-effects.

This presidential race mumbo jumbo is like pulling off the Band-Aid motherlode. Somebody make it quick and painless.

Baby, It's Cold Outside


“Gays: finally bringing developing African countries into globalization's bosoms.”

Friday, August 29, 2008

Dear Mark A. Rose

Dear Mark A. Rose,





Feel free to fuck yourself.

Best,
T.V. Fritz

Thursday, August 28, 2008

This blog is officially gay

See more Kristin Chenoweth videos at Funny or Die


Sheesh. My BMI Lehman Engel Musical Theater workshop audition is next week. Cut me some slack, honeychild.

My warped mind is addled with imperfect rhymes and misaccented words.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Scenes from Edinburgh


Beatboxer Adam Matta and actress Lizzie Wort

Scenes from Edinburgh (Part Deux)


Breeder experimental circus composer Sxip Shirey.

This picture proves John McCain's evolution in douchebaggery




Can anyone else pinpoint the exact moment when John McCain became a supreme douche? Ugh. He's morphed into a Republican android.

Us Weekly dishes on Madonna's limp dicked Hitler-McCain analogy. (Really, Madge? How nouveau riche.) Meanwhile, Idolator belches the factoids on McCain's celebrity endorsements. If his Daddy Yankee shout-out doesn't deliver the 12-year-old Mexican girl vote, I don't know what will, dear reader.

"It's not surprising that Barack Obama and his fellow celebrities stick together," McCain spokesperson Taylor Griffin sniffed.

Apparently, Griffin's been reading Bill Hobbs' wah-bulance playbook again. Cry me a frickin' river.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

The devil went down to Edinburgh



Off to Edinburgh. See you honkies on the flip side!

Friday, August 08, 2008

I can't stop listening to this song



Cyborg r&b singer Janelle Monáe was originally schooled in Sondheim at the American Musical and Dramatic Academy in New York. Luckily for us, her Broadway dreams fell into the gutter.

Her futuristic rock opus, Metropolis will be released by P. Diddy's (or whatever the hell he calls himself these days) Bad Boy Entertainment. But don't let Douche McDouche's association sway you. The concept album is a homage to silent film director Fritz Lang as told by Monáe's alter-ego, Cindi Mayweather.

Monday, August 04, 2008

Standing on the edge of control




Via Feministing

The blog post where I adopt my Groundskeeper Willie burr



Aye sir, Scots. Have ye gone waxy in your beester? Nobleman Greg Walloch wilt be appearin' in "And The Devil May Drag You Under" in the month of August at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival. Good for what ails ya!